It’s raining Viagra. It’s not just the erection campaign advertising including television commercials, radio spots, billboards, magazine articles, and late night talk shows. The U.S. has become Viagra Nation. It’s like an overexposed celebrity you still hear about eighteen times a day in the media. Junk e-mail, or spam, is perhaps the biggest pusher of the little blue pill. It is estimated that twenty-five percent of all “spam” is trying to sell Viagra. The federal Can-Spam Act was created in part to combat this nuisance. It still hasn’t solved the problem and you may need to take matters into your own hands. Consider a spam blocker.
Viagra saturation has societal consequences on our perceptions of masculinity, sex, and norms of behavior. In a Mother Jones interview, Meika Loe (The Rise of Viagra: How the Little Blue Pill Changed Sex in America) attributes sociologist George Ritzer’s term “McDonaldization” to sex in our society. It refers to the notion that the ethic of fast food has saturated our culture in how many products and ideas are sold including sexuality – and Viagra. According to Loe, “We are constantly striving for the unattainable”. This is the Supersize trap.” I believe I’ve found a man who is a victim of that trap. Even the government has got skin in the foreskin game. A Jan 13, 2014 Reuters report notes that “Penis pumps cost the U.S. government’s Medicare program $172 million between 2006 and 2011”.
I meet the life adventurer and full time Viagra enthusiast we shall refer to as the “San Diegan” at the Jamba Juice in San Diego’s downtown Horton Plaza. Today is a special shopping day. Once a month, the San Diegan takes an arduous journey to acquire a few pharmaceutical items he deems necessary to live life at “an optimal level.” He is dressed casually in jeans, flip flops, and a T-Shirt. He sips on his mixed juice drink and delights in the selection he has made. He is starting an all raw foods diet in hopes it will increase his energy level. I get the impression that the San Diegan often looks for exterior means by which to improve himself. Viagra is one of those ways.
To understand the Viagra phenomenon is to understand the very nature of the society in which we live, our place in it, and how live in the New Viagra Order. First, we must examine how we got here. The answer is money. Lots of money for advertising. And advertising isn’t just advertising. Meika Loe brings up a disturbing truth: “What they don’t know is that when they are looking at their favorite medical websites or seeing a news program that features a medical expert, a good number of those experts are paid consultants. I think we need to be wary of this…blurry line between science and marketing.”
Viagra debuted in 1998 and was an immediate commercial success. Men suffering from varying degrees of impotency pounded down the doors to doctors’ offices worldwide. Two million prescriptions were filled in the first two months of the debut. By 2005, twenty-three million men were prescribed the wonder drug. Pfizer, the manufacturer, has made billions. Every year.
The San Diegan, an avid reader with a scary knack for recall (he once competed on a short-lived game show Win Ben Stein’s Money) tells me he first got the idea of trying “vitamin V”, as he calls it, from one of his favorite online magazines – Salon.com. It’s easy to see how the minor manifesto Diary of a Viagra Fiend by Jason Gallaway could entice new members into pill popping. Galloway describes his first experience on Viagra: “Man, this is great. The surprise in my pants is like Elvis in the ’68 comeback special, when he showed up all slimmed down, clad head-to-toe in black leather, looking like a bad ass, and everybody was damn glad to see he could still rock. Yeah. That’s me.”
How can you beat that?
If you’re a virile teenage boy who fears the revelatory biological issues inherent in walking around in non-constraining jogging pants, you may wonder what all the fuss is about. Be grateful for what you don’t know. What you chose not to know is that you are getting older and there are problems associated with aging. At least one of those problems has been taken care of for you already. Though your penile prowess naturally declines with age, there is a pharmaceutical solution. You sigh in relief.
But wait. If things are good down there now…how good could they be if you boosted them even further? Galloway writes: “I am overjoyed at this medical breakthrough and am thinking about having a big red and blue “S” tattooed on you know what. Maybe get if fitted for a little red cape.” Could you become Superman? The drug companies want you to think so. Not officially, of course. They are only concerned with market share. Guess what? You’re the new market share. That market includes the San Diegan, who, though not a teenager, is a relatively young man. A reason Viagra is popular with men who do not suffer from impotence is the reduction in the refractory period – the time it takes to become hard after ejaculation. The San Diegan first tried Viagra when he was twenty-eight. Since then, it has become a staple of his, er…routine . Much like the Jamba juice he picks up three times a week.
The San Diegan, now in his forties describing himself as a “partier”, goes on to explain, “I like to go to parties and I like to sneak into them even if I’m not invited.” Included in his survival kit (the black bag he perpetually carries) are a couple of doses of Viagra. The San Diegan does not own a car. I ask him how long he has been without wheels and he says, “a couple of years.” I feel a bit judgmental pressing him further to ask him why he goes without such a basic necessity. Why doesn’t he use some money he has saved to purchase a vehicle? He vaguely asserts, “I’m doing some other things. I just have to concentrate on doing some other things.” I ask about his job status to which he replies, “I’m just kinda hanging out.” The San Diegan has just been laid off of a long term office temp job. For the last couple of years he has gone though a cycle of working for just enough time to collect unemployment for the other half of the year. This strategy gives him the time and clarity “to do the things in life that really matter.” Amongst those things are surfing, writing, partying, and popping Viagra.
When economic times are hard and you’re not getting hard, you have an option: go to Mexico for your Viagra. That’s where the San Diegan does his shopping, and hence our destination. On average, prescription drugs in Mexico are half of the cost that they are here in the United States. Sometimes they are less. Keep in mind, it is illegal to import a prescription drug unless it is for personal or family use. Use common sense when determining what would be considered a personal supply.
The red San Diego City Trolley stops in front of us. It reminds me of a symbol of my childhood. I can’t help but think what Mr. Rogers would think of our mission into a foreign land via the trolley to snag an erection drug. The San Diegan boards by flashing his transit pass. I pay for my day pass. Mass transit is a weird thing. You see and rub elbows with people you never do during the course of car driven Los Angeles life. There are a lot of Mexican day workers on this bus ride. I see callused hands. I imagine the laborious work of the men retreating back into their country to feed their families. And here the San Diegan and myself are on a leisurely afternoon, invading their country for kicks. It’s obscene.
When we arrive, the sight of the world’s most visited border runway looks like an army checkpoint. The whole trip, complete with screaming kids and bad breath, has taken almost an hour. But going through the Mexican border guards is a breeze. They might as well not even be there. They are like attendants at a parking garage where no fee is due and wave you by. A short walk into Tijuana and the first thing you notice are pharmacies. Lots of them. They have names that make you scratch your head like “New York Pharmacy”, “Medicine Man Farmacia”, and “American Pharmacy”. The drug stores closest to the border cater to Americans such as senior citizens who want to save money on their heart medication. The stores also cater to shoppers, like the San Diegan, who seek substances unavailable in the U.S. like Piracetam – the so-called “smart drug“ that the San Diegan believes helps him with his creative pursuits.
The San Diegan subscribes to the notion of “Better Living Through Chemistry”. This idea, originally a slogan the DuPont company adopted during the 1930’s, was co-opted by the 1960’s counterculture for their own purposes. Now the San Diego stands tall with the idea for his own purposes. On the Viagra phenomenon, the San Diegan enthusiastically says, “it’s been a real boon to our society.”
Evaluating the truth of this assertion depends on who you are and where you are in the social strata. Viagra has critical affects of people of various persuasions, occupations, and economic conditions. If you’re a hedonist, Viagra is a godsend. If you’re a gun-toting member of the National Rifle Association, you could have a small member which will look bigger if it’s hard, so Viagra may be for you. If you’re Hugh Hefner, you’ve got nothing left to prove and freely admit to Viagra use. If you’re any man you probably hate yourself for not being him.
If you’re a critic of the capitalist system, (I won’t call you a Marxist because there aren’t enough of you), the Viagra phenomenon is further evidence of runaway excess. According to Meika Loe:
“I think we’re really seeing the fusion of science and capitalism, and that can be troubling when we still hold medicine and science up to a very high standard. Most people believe science to be quite neutral and unbiased…One of the things I did not anticipate going into my five years of research. I attended meeting after meeting about sexual dysfunction, medical meetings for medical credits, rooms of 500 medical practitioners and featured speakers. About halfway through my research I found out that the majority of the speakers are associated with the industry in some way, either as paid consultants or investigators, and that many of the people in the audience are, too. It even affects publishing of clinical trials. The sad thing is that most people don’t realize this.”
If you are Christian fundamentalist steeped in end times conspiracy, chalk up Viagra to your list of signs of the Antichrist. “Pfizer” and “Viagra” each contain six letters. Pfizer began shipping its first U.S. products containing radio frequency identification tags on Viagra packaging. Pharmacies and wholesalers can verify the electronic product code through electronic scanners that transmit the code over the Internet directly to Pfizer’s corporate website. Pfizer claims it does not collect patient information. The stated intent of the technology is to combat drug counterfeiters, of which Viagra is a favorite. An obvious ploy. Remember, the Antichrist is a deceiver. Write to the 700 Club (and send more money) to get the word out.
If you work in a drugstore in Tijuana, you can take a very hands-on approach to Viagra sales. When we enter the Seven-Eleven style drug store, help isn’t easy to find at first. When we do track down a pharmacist, he adamantly denounces the San Diegan’s frugal idea: to save some money, he is considering purchasing the generic version of the drug. The pharmacist, who seems more like a store clerk, insures us the real Viagra is better. He knows. We take his advice, though we are a little disturbed by the extent of his interest in the San Diegan’s needs. This unusual encounter further compels me to learn how all kinds of people are affected by the little blue pill.
If you’re a paranormal investigator on the hunt for Sasquatch or Yeti in Appalachia, Viagra may be of use to you. During those long excursions in the high mountains tracking, collecting Bigfoot dung, and speaking with local hermits, the thin air can really slow you down. Viagra was conceived as a potential treatment for high blood pressure and sildenafil (Viagra’s chemical name) causes the lungs to relax. In 2004, an experiment involving Mt.Everest mountaineers showed Viagra increased the heart’s maximum workload. Another study involving cyclists at a high altitude showed a thirty-three percent improvement in the average time of those who took the drug compared to those who took a placebo. You may be able to solve the case of the missing link faster than you realized. Of course, if you do find Bigfoot, he may be more surprised at the sight of you on Viagra than you are of him. The same studies showed no sign of performance increases at sea level, so don’t waste your supply on the chupacabra hunt in Mexico.
Atten-hut! Military researchers are considering a study to learn if Viagra can help soldiers perform better at high altitudes. Say you’re stationed in the mountains of Afghanistan, – get ahead of the curve and have your worried wife back in the States send you a pallet of little blue pills, it could save your life. Assure to her that you won’t be tempted by the Afghani women because if you touch one, the woman could be subject to “mercy killing” by her male relatives to defend the family’s honor. And you couldn’t have that. And that brings us to the obvious related subject. Osama bin Laden. Osama Bin Laden fathered twenty-four children and was found with a huge stash of pornography-drenched computer hard drives in his compound (a detail regrettably left out of Zero Dark Thirty). Did Osama use Viagra? HOLY JIHAD! Could that be that the reason he was one step ahead of everyone in mountains of Tora Bora? Through what channels could he have gotten his supply? What kind of coordination would the courier have had to do?
It’s true. The Middle East parties too. Islam parties. In Dubai, Pfizer’s office reports a dramatic rise in Viagra sales during the Eid al-Fitr festival, the breaking of Ramadam’s fast. According to the Jerusalem Post, a prescription for Viagra is issued in Israel on average once every minute. But if you’re Jewish, know that there was a ban on Viagra during the holiest holiday. The coating was considered inedible during Passover. Thank the God of Moses that a solution has been found. You’ll need to stock up on a special variety of Viagra to party on Passover. Pfizer Pharmaceuticals-Israel manufactures a version encased in a special soluble kosher gelatin capsule. Swallowing the capsule does not break Halakhah (Jewish Law) because the Viagra does not come into direct contact with the body. Just make sure you’re doing it with a Jewish girl. I’d say “porkin”, but that that wouldn’t be kosher.
If you’re an environmentalist, Viagra is a beacon of hope for a dying planet. For years, conservationists have been turning blue in the face over the destruction of rare animals for the purpose of grinding them up into sex potions. Rhino horns, tiger penises, endangered sea turtle eggs, and even sea cucumbers have been traditional agents for boosting strength of the male member. Pharmacological answers to impotence certainly are gaining converts who had previously used environmentally damaging folk remedies. A study in the science journal Environmental Conversation found that in Hong Kong, the demand for similarly priced animal products for impotency at pharmacies had fallen off by half.
Maybe it’s the bright Hawaiian shirt I am wearing. Maybe it’s the San Diegan’s too-cool-for-school demeanor. The call rings out and I feel a little reflexive tug from inside. “Bag check,” says a border security guard. I look at the San Diegan with a sternness that demands for an explanation. I thought you said this was okay. They rummage through his bag and discover the Viagra and some Piracetam. They ask if he has a prescription for those items. He says he left the prescription at home. The border guard gives him the weak reprimand of a parent who knows the child is not listening. They check my bag too, but seem more occupied with their colleagues snickering in the corner over the Viagra and the San-Diegan’s awkwardness. I swear one of them is making an sophomoric humping gesture.
If you are a Floridian and concerned about privacy, you can cover your prescription Viagra tracks by making an arrangement with a friend to fill the prescription under his name. Under Florida state law, it is usually okay to prescribe medication in a third party’s name if they agree and the doctor accurately documents it. However, if you are a habitual drug offender like Rush Limbaugh, you may be flagged for this practice as was he during a three hour detainment by the country sheriff at the Palm Beach International Airport.
A feminist perspective on the Viagra phenomenon criticizes the focus on the penis. There was already much too much penis in a world before Viagra. Now, focusing on not just a penis, but a hard penis seems to be a way for men to reassert their dominance and hence the patriarchal problem with society in the first place. So, this is a problem.
If you’re a man strapped for cash, Viagra may be a necessary aid when you try to cash in at the local sperm bank The preferred age for donors is twenty-two to forty and often the individual must have a verifiable college education and be in good health. But, if you’re college educated, why would you be doing such an embarrassing task where only the best candidates receive a paltry two hundred dollars per donation? The answer is that you majored in liberal arts and that means you’ve got some serious work to do at sperm central. But it’s cold in that room and every time you go in you’re staring at a non-caring cup. Blame Shakespeare and Nietzsche. You could use some love and attention for your donation preparation because performance anxiety in this clinical environment is not uncommon. Viagra is your Popeye spinach.
If you can’t get too much of a good thing, you might be a Viagraholic. If Viagra is destroying your life, there is hope. You can check into a 12 step program at Viagraholics Anonymous (viagraholics.com). There you will find testimonials of those afflicted with Viagra addiction. One addict confesses, “I couldn’t go into the office because I couldn’t control my erections…When I lost my job, I just stayed home all day, taking Viagra and masturbating.”
Alternatives to Viagra do exist and one would be remiss not to seek them out. Lay off the impotence-inducing recreational drugs like pot (which the San Diegan admits to using occasionally). You could also either A) Get a hotter girlfriend or B) Get a girlfriend who doesn’t care. Each has an up and a down side.
The San Diegan has the non-performance angle covered. He says he carries the Viagra with him “as an insurance policy.” He explains that during his first time with a new woman he can experience “stage fright.” He adds “It’s not just a pharmacological help, but a psychological help because you really don’t have to worry because it’s not going to fail. You’re not going to psych yourself out.” So Viagra is like the ultimate wingman, evening holding your hand when you’re approaching the landing pad.
San Diegan explains the problem of performance anxiety. Some men, even young men that are physically healthy, have problems achieving an erection when the heat is on. The extreme of this is James Spader’s character in Sex, Lies and Videotape who can only get off if he watches women confessing their sexual histories on video. Luckily for Spader, he had Andy McDowell set him straight. Curing Mr. Softy for you might be Tony Robbins or some other self-help guru to raise your confidence level. Dudley Danoff, MD, a Los Angeles urologist and the author of Superpotency, states the benefits for someone without ED, “are mostly psychogenic. If I were to give a blue-colored placebo to 100 guys under 50 years old, 30 of them would call in the morning and say, ‘That pill was like magic.’”
But the San Diegan is convinced that it’s the Viagra that makes the world an easier place to live in. Like computers. And we know the truth about that. So, what if you pop a pill in anticipation of the big score only to find that you’re all revved up with no place to go? The San Diegan says he’s never had that problem. But the ultimate question still haunts the dark regions of the Viagra user’s psyche, the place where killer clowns and fanged vaginas exist. What exactly do you do “if your erection lasts longer than four hours”? The commercials simply say “seek medical attention”. What does that mean?
It’s the worst nightmare for Viagra users: A late night dash to the hospital, only to wait another six hours in an emergency room sporting a chubby while patients with “urgent emergencies” are wheeled into a doctor’s salvation, one by one. This ain’t no party and your condition can be a sign of priapism, a rare condition defined by prolonged erections without presence of sexual arousal. It is associated with hypertension, some blood diseases, and drug abuse. Priapism is dangerous if not treated. If you have a painful erection for over twelve hours, you can experience permanent damage. Depending upon what type of priapism is thought to be the culprit, the treatment could be drawing blood from the penis with a needle and injecting saline or performing a surgical shunt. You don’t want to know what that involves.
Viagra has made us face other uncomfortable realities. Once upon a time was that creepy Bob Dole thing. But now, it’s your Dad. And all your friends dads. And your friends and maybe it won’t stop until it’s you too. Wait. You don’t want to think about Viagra and your Dad. Time to tap into the neural linguistic programming you learned from Tony Robbins. Every time you’re at your parents’ house and stumble upon your father’s Viagra bottle in the medicine cabinet, pull on your ring finger which you have programmed to induce a satisfactory immersive recollection beautiful swell across the horizon on a tropical island vacation. The one you saw played back in the high def television at your favorite Thai restaurant.
I ask the San Diegan if he had thought about using a self-help method rather than Viagra to combat performance anxiety. He says he’s a big believer in self help and regularly practices yoga and meditation. He is quick to assure me that it is only the first time with a new woman that can be a problem for him. “After that, I’m okay.” He adds, “I don’t have ED, by any means.” The San Diegan, who holds a master’s degree and formerly instructed at a community college, says about Viagra and the other ED drugs, “I think they have virile affect and are fully integrated into the mainstream culture. They’re here to stay.”
Be wary of the myth that Viagra is a magic bullet for your love life or waning manhood. To be sure, the strength of Viagra is its ability to correct a man’s erection problems. Whether this remedy solves the problems in his relationship is another story. Often, men and women lack a shared language for understanding each other. As we are continually reminded by advertisements and testimonials in the media, Viagra can help correct the erection problem. Australian researchers have concluded that the omnipresence of Viagra commercials has created sexual anxiety in men who previously did not have a performance problem. Meika Loe concurs, “worrying about ED may in fact cause ED,” she says. If a man is worried only about his lost machismo while his partner is concerned about a lack of emotional intimacy, then the reconstitution of a firm penis is not likely to provide them with a happily-ever-after. And that’s not good for anyone.
There is no doubt that Viagra and other ED drugs have a long life ahead of them. Longer. Harder. Superviagra. MegaViagra. If you’re an investor, the ups and downs of the market can be staggering. Any improvement over the current drugs will be met with a spike in the price of the company stock. One thing to be sure of: female Viagra is the holy grail of chemical sex. Invest early, sell quickly, and you’ll you be rich. If women with pent up frustration get their due, and use it with the self-knowledge that some Viagra men lack, the world will be a kinder, gentler place. And that’s good for everyone.
